Of all the bridge trolls and inner demons that we must all face and conquer on our path to prosperity, perhaps the most insidious and pernicious is envy. Envy is a particularly powerful challenge because it represents a perfect trifecta of bad ingredients: a faulty mindset and negative attitude compounded by a strong emotional factor that can usually be traced all the way back to childhood.
Envy is harmful because it prevents us from properly celebrating the victories of others, it robs us of the joy of participating in their achievements and it robs those that achieve and reach their goals of the full experience of sharing their wins with the rest of us. If our victories become trees silently falling in the forest, our drive to achieve more will be greatly diminished.
As much as envy harms those that achieve goals and are denied the rightful respect and admiration of their peers, it harms the person who is infected with envy on a much deeper level. Allowing envy to inhabit your heart, your soul, and your mind is an excellent and efficient way to shield yourself from enjoying your own personal victories and achievements.
Not only will the trifecta of bad ingredients make it nearly impossible for you to move forward towards prosperity, it will discourage others from praising and enjoying any wins with you should you somehow overcome the harmful internal effects of envy. You cannot expect others to come to your party if you decline to participate in theirs, can you?
It is normal and natural for a child to experience envy. Children are born helpless, they learn quickly to cry when they want or need something and that which they require is soon delivered.
Since children start with almost nothing, everything others have looks good to them. They want what they see, and they don’t have the emotional experience to process that desire properly. They want something right now and if they cannot have it, they become upset.
As they get older, they learn to process that emotion appropriately and learn how to earn or acquire what they need, and learn to choose what things are worthwhile and which things are not.
While most emotionally stable and healthy adults have learned these lessons well, some of us still retain a vestigial remnant of this juvenile behavior. We see something that someone else has or something another person has achieved, and we want it for ourselves, but have not appropriately processed how to handle that desire in a healthy way.
Like a child, we simply want it now and are mad that someone else has it first. Because this emotional component is rooted in childhood, it has a strong grip on us and is hard to extricate without shining a bright light on it, and that amount of introspection can be uncomfortable.
But if we ever want to be free of it and if we want to be truly unleashed to achieve our own high levels of prosperity, we absolutely must address this issue and conquer it. How do we do this?
First, we must embrace the concept of abundance. We must accept and acknowledge as fact that the world we live in is incredibly abundant and expansive in nature.
This is not just something that motivational authors and speakers say, it is the simple truth. Every day, the sun gives us huge amounts of free energy. This energy grows plants and sustains life, living creatures and plants grow continually without any help from us.
Every day, new humans are created who will soon contribute their own capacity to think and to work to the collective account of mankind.
Our world grows and expands and thus provides an ever-increasing pool of resources and assets for us all to strive towards and attain. Not one of us ever leaves this life and takes our assets with us.
Everything ever created is still here in some form, ready to be had by the next ambitious person. Knowing that there is always more for us to get will help us not be envious of what someone else has attained. Life is not pie, what they have does not reduce what is available for you.
Second, we must embrace the concept of empathy and union with our fellow humans. We must learn to see our reactions to their victories through their eyes and emotions. If we are envious, they notice. It robs them from the full enjoyment of their achievement and diminishes you in their regard.
It also makes it probable that you will receive the same unenthusiastic response if you have a similar win. How would that feel? When you hollow out another’s win, you also hollow out your next win.
Let’s try to think of the other person’s achievement as opening the door wider for us to walk through. Instead of lamenting that they got there first, let’s instead try to pass through the door they opened and surge ahead towards the next door, the next level of prosperity. Celebrate their victory with genuine joy and use it as a catalyst for your own achievements.
Doing this will make you a person that others want to see succeed. People sincerely want to help others who are involved in the celebrations of others. Being perceived as a person who is free of envy opens you up to the goodwill of those around you and any achievement of magnitude takes the cooperation of many people.
People will not be likely to help you if you are known as petty and envious of others. Be a team player and you will soon have others celebrating your big wins with you!
Art Merrill- Lifelong entrepreneur and small business owner. You can visit my blog here: https://whynotyoudotblog.wordpress.com/blog/
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